Time for the Happy Dance!

Week 20 came and went with a zero on the scale, but that was completely okay. I still stuck to my points, exercised, and did my thing. Zeroes happen and I refuse to allow them to derail me, or even disappoint me for more than 2.2 seconds. So on I moved!

Week 21 had a lot going on with the girls' dance recitals and a few other things. I missed a couple of days' work outs and that's okay too. Life is always changing and we have to change with it. I got right back to it once things settled down and didn't beat myself up over it. But I did feel a little"off" because of it if that makes any sense.

Weigh-in day. I've been anticipating, wishing for, wanting that 50 pounds mark so bad I can taste it for a couple of weeks now. Today was the day! Today the scale revealed a 3 pound loss, which puts my total at 52 pounds!!! I'm over the moon! 100, I'm comin' after you next! :-)

Note: My list was getting very long, so I'm going to start posting from week 20 here. If you want to see the stats from weeks 1-20, check out any post before this one.

Week 20: 287, -0 lb./-49 lb. total
Week 21: 284, -3 lb./-52 lb. total

One Determined Mama

 My sister and I had a converstion this week about willpower and determination. I told her I wish I could bottle mine up and give it to those struggling to lose weight who really need it. We all know it doesn't work that way, but it the conversation did get me thinking. 

I've lost 50 pounds twice before on Weight Watchers. Both times I had barely hit that milestone when I found out I was pregnant (with Joshua, then Aaron). As proud as I was to be 50 pounds down, finding out I was pregnant was a relief. It gave me a reason to quit! Both times I struggled to stay on track after the first 6 weeks or so, and both times I could feel myself unraveling toward the end, and fast. Being pregnant was the perfect cover-up. No one ever had to know how close I had come to throwing in the towel and reverting to my old ways. 

I haven't wavered in my resolve this time. My determination hasn't faltered. Some days/weeks are harder than others, sure, but I haven't once wanted to quit. What's the difference? Why am I not falling apart right about now? 

December 29th I woke up, in more ways than one. I've said I literally opened my eyes that morning and said, "I'm done. Enough is enough." And it's true, I did. But I really believe God shook me that morning, saying, "You've been praying for change, for peace, for so long... it has to start with you. YOU must do this because you are more than capable and I won't do this for you or you'll never see how strong and able you really are." That's the difference. Not that He pushed, as I'm sure He had been pushing for quite a long while, but that I listened and embraced it. 

You all know I'm sooooo close to 50 pounds lost. I would have loved to step on the scale this morning to find I had made it there, but I saw a 2 pound loss instead and I am not disappointed. I have lost 49 pounds and will hopefully be celebrating my 50 this time next week! 

Starting weight: 336 lb.

Goal weight: 150 lb.

Week 1: 328, -8 lb.

Week 2: 325, -3 lb./-11 lb. total

Week 3: 323, -2 lb./-13 lb. total

Week 4: 317, -6 lb./-19 lb. total

Week 5: 314, -3 lb./-22 lb. total

Week 6: 312, -2 lb./-24 lb. total

Week 7: 312, -0 lb./-24 lb. total

Week 8: 306, -6 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 9: 306, -0 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 10: 306, -0 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 11: 304, -2 lb./-32 lb. total

Week 12: 300, -4 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 13: 300, -0 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 14: 300, -0 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 15: 298, -2 lb./-38 lb. total

Week 16: 295, -3 lb./-41 lb. total

Week 17: 293, -2 lb./-43 lb. total

Week 18: 289, -4 lb./-47 lb. total

Week 19: 287, -2 lb./-49 lb. total

No Quitters Here

90 days. I have worked out exactly 90 days since the end of December. 5 days a week for 18 weeks is 90 days. 

A few weeks into working out I remember saying to Mom, "I really don't want to exercise, but I do it anyway. Will there come a time when I want to do this?" She said there would but I'm not sure I believed her. 

This week we were talking about my weight loss and progress and it occurred to me that somewhere along the way it had happened. I am now someone who likes to work out. I no longer dread it. In fact, I crave the satisfaction I feel at the end of a workout. I love the way it makes me feel, physically (incredibly strong) and mentally (strong, but also accomplished and clear-headed). It happened without my even realizing it. 

That's not to say it's been easy-going. There have been more than a few workouts that made me cry. Runs are insanely hard. I've cried during 3 of those. But you know what? I NEVER quit. Not once. I kept going until the workout was done. I used to be a quitter. Not anymore. 

Today's weigh-in: I stepped on the scale hoping for something. Anything. I'm getting so close to 50 pounds lost I'm becoming anxious and a tad impatient - 2 things weight loss doesn't care about. I was pleasantly surprised to see a 4 pound loss which put me at 289 - out of the 290's! Only 3 pounds to go until I meet me first 50 pound goal, woohoo! 

Starting weight: 336 lb.

Goal weight: 150 lb.

Week 1: 328, -8 lb.

Week 2: 325, -3 lb./-11 lb. total

Week 3: 323, -2 lb./-13 lb. total

Week 4: 317, -6 lb./-19 lb. total

Week 5: 314, -3 lb./-22 lb. total

Week 6: 312, -2 lb./-24 lb. total

Week 7: 312, -0 lb./-24 lb. total

Week 8: 306, -6 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 9: 306, -0 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 10: 306, -0 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 11: 304, -2 lb./-32 lb. total

Week 12: 300, -4 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 13: 300, -0 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 14: 300, -0 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 15: 298, -2 lb./-38 lb. total

Week 16: 295, -3 lb./-41 lb. total

Week 17: 293, -2 lb./-43 lb. total

Week 18: 289, -4 lb./-47 lb. total

Inching Along... Or Am I Rolling?

17 weeks ago I started this journey. It has certainly seemed slow going at times, but 4 months have gone by quite quickly when I think about it.

There have been easy days and days that proved quite challenging. But you know, I haven't had one single day when I seriously considered giving up. Not one. Eating right is just what I do. Exercising is just what I do. Not feeling sorry for myself or playing victim is just what I do (most of the time :-) and it feels fantastic! I'm coming to realize this is not something I'm going to quit. I don't live in fear that tomorrow I won't be able to do it. It's just what I do. I have a new way if life. And it rocks.

I stepped on the scale this morning to find myself 2 pounds closer to my short-term and long-term goals. I am now down 43 pounds!!! I have 7 more to go before meeting my first 50 pound goal and rewarding myself with a day trip to Biltmore Estate! 

Starting weight: 336 lb.

Goal weight: 150 lb.

Week 1: 328, -8 lb.

Week 2: 325, -3 lb./-11 lb. total

Week 3: 323, -2 lb./-13 lb. total

Week 4: 317, -6 lb./-19 lb. total

Week 5: 314, -3 lb./-22 lb. total

Week 6: 312, -2 lb./-24 lb. total

Week 7: 312, -0 lb./-24 lb. total

Week 8: 306, -6 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 9: 306, -0 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 10: 306, -0 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 11: 304, -2 lb./-32 lb. total

Week 12: 300, -4 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 13: 300, -0 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 14: 300, -0 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 15: 298, -2 lb./-38 lb. total

Week 16: 295, -3 lb./-41 lb. total

Week 17: 293, -2 lb./-43 lb. total

I Do So Love a New Stroller

I was super excited to find a great jogging stroller at a fairly low price on Craigslist! I picked it up Tuesday afternoon and I couldn't wait for my Wednesday run. 

Today is Wednesday. Today I learned something about jogging strollers. First, most jogging strollers have a fixed front wheel. In order to turn it, you must push down on the handlebar a tad. I knew this ahead of time and practiced a tad with it here in the driveway/yard. Not as hard as I had expected. Yay!

What I hadn't anticipated was that it takes FAR more energy to push a stroller while running than it does to run freely, arms swinging. The stroller itself rides so smoothly it feels like nothing to push. It's the controlling your arms, holding them in the same spot while running, when your arms naturally move, that got me. My energy was zapped before we were half done. The girls took him at that point and I ran the last half without the stroller, but it was too late. I ended up crying for most of the last 3 minutes, and for a solid 2 minutes afterwards during our cool down walk.

Lesson learned. I still love my new jogging stroller, but I'll be using it for walking until running becomes a bit easier for me. The girls can walk him in the meantime. 

Sweet Sixteen

Week 16... week 16!!! That's almost 4 months! I have been eating right and exercising for 16 weeks now. I have worked out Monday-Friday for 16 weeks. I changed my mind 16 weeks ago. More importantly, I changed my LIFE 16 weeks ago. 

Guess what I know now? I know that I am strong. Stronger than I ever thought possible. I know that I have  stamina, will power, and enough determination for 10 people. Oh! And I'm a runner! I'm not fast or good at it yet, but I AM a runner. 

Is my life easy? Heck no. There are more stressors in my life right now than there have been in quite awhile, but the exercise helps beyond measure with that. I may weigh just a tad under 300, and I may still look like a blob, but my insides don't match my outsides. My insides feel like I've lost 100 pounds already. :-)

Week 16 was run-of-the-mill. Nothing crazy good or crazy bad going on. Just life. But a small milestone was passed this morning when I stepped on the scale and saw a 3 pound loss because it put me over 40! I am officially down 41 pounds!!! Woohoo! 50, here I come. 

This has been a roller coaster ride, to say the least. Some weeks are great, some weeks I trudge through and can't wait to see the end of. Week 17 will find me buckled in and ready! And determined.

Starting weight: 336 lb.

Goal weight: 150 lb.

Week 1: 328, -8 lb.

Week 2: 325, -3 lb./-11 lb. total

Week 3: 323, -2 lb./-13 lb. total

Week 4: 317, -6 lb./-19 lb. total

Week 5: 314, -3 lb./-22 lb. total

Week 6: 312, -2 lb./-24 lb. total

Week 7: 312, -0 lb./-24 lb. total

Week 8: 306, -6 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 9: 306, -0 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 10: 306, -0 lb./-30 lb. total

Week 11: 304, -2 lb./-32 lb. total

Week 12: 300, -4 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 13: 300, -0 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 14: 300, -0 lb./-36 lb. total

Week 15: 298, -2 lb./-38 lb. total

Week 16: 295, -3 lb./-41 lb. total

So Excited... Big News!

I do have some big news, but first I want to say my heart is broken and goes out to all affected by the Boston Marathon bombings. They are in my thoughts and prayers.

I bought a T-shirt today from the More Than Just Me foundation. They are doing wonderful things, raising awareness and funds for Cystic Fibrosis. Right now they are selling shirts to benefit those in Boston hurting, grieving, recovering. The front of the shirt says "We Will Run" and the back says "Running for Boston 4/15/13". You should definitely check them out!

Okay, so my big news. I am registered for my first 5k! The Electric Run is at the end of July. It's a night run filled with great music and lightshows, and lots and lots of glow sticks. It's going to be super fun, crazy hard, and so worth it! I get ridiculously excited just thinking about it! :-)

Now, onto Saturday's weigh-in. I think this is going to be a good week.