I didn't blog last week. I faced another zero on the scale. I don't even know how many weeks it's been now. 5? 6? I stopped counting. It feels like a really long time, that's all I know. And it's getting old. I've racked my brain for what I can do differently, what I might be doing wrong, what might be causing this stall (even if it's something I can't control), and all this thinking about it is driving me crazy. The scale is, after all, just a tool. It is a measurement of my weight. It tells me each week whether or not I've dropped a few pounds, and while very useful on this journey it can become a burden when you reach a point like where I am right now. It can bring you down. It can make you sad. Or worse, it can cause you to become obsessed and want to get on it EVERY single day. Which is where I've been for the past week and a half. I've been on it every morning in that time frame, hoping to see it budge just a little. It never does. It's enough to drive one mad. And so, today, I will NOT get on the scale.
You read that right. Today I will not get on the scale. And I won't do it tomorrow either. Or the next day. My happiness in my journey has become too reliant upon it. Which means I've been unhappy a lot lately. Plateau's are going to happen. This one for me is most likely due to the enormous amount of stress I am under. I can't change what is happening in my life right now. I can't make the scale move. All I can do is stick to my points, make good food choices, run, work out, drink lots of water, and let the scale move in its own time. Oh, and not obsess over that number. Just as that number does not define me, whether or not it gets smaller each week should have no bearing on my happiness.
There are other tools to measure my success. How do I feel physically? How are my clothes fitting? How do I feel in my body? Does my body feel strong? Can I do things now that I couldn't do 8 months ago? How is my energy level? Do I look different in pictures? There are all sorts of ways to measure my progress, and this week every time I have the urge to hop on that scale I'm going to think about these things and resist it. I've got to get back to weighing in one day a week and not thinking about it the rest of the week.
Week 30: 271, -0 lb./-65 lb. total
Week 31: 271, -0 lb./-65 lb. total
Week 32: 271, -0 lb./-65 lb. total
Week 33: no weigh-in
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