Pictures Are Hard to Bear

If you are my FaceBook friend, you know that I had literally millions of pictures (okay, maybe not millions) of my kiddos, but only a handful of myself. And most of the pics in that handful were old. REALLY old.  I am even going to admit that I recently posted a picture on FB of myself with others, and I blocked almost every single girl I went to high school with from seeing it. Yep, pictures are hard to bear.

But not here, and not anymore. My children deserve to have pictures of me, with me. They are going to want to look back at old photos someday and see their childhoods painted there, but how will that be if I am in none of them? They spend 99% of their time with me. How can all the pictures  have no mommy?

So, here it is.

This is me. The one hiding behind the curly-haired beauty in the in the red shirt. This is me after years of putting myself on the back burner and then turning if off completely. Maybe I’ll get used to being in pictures sometime down the road. Maybe I’ll be able to look at them without cringing in the near future. Until then, I’ll force myself to post them anyway. Then maybe mirrors will become easier too.